Light in the Dark
by KimLevi95
Summary: A romance blossoms in the midst of despair and ugliness. Coulistair.


**Light in the Dark**

Raven opened her eyes. She could not remember the last time she had more than a few hours of sleep since she left Highever. She never would have left if Duncan hadn't conscripted her to join the Grey Wardens. She would have preferred to stay by her parents' side, even if it meant her death. But her parents begged her to leave with Duncan and as much as she resisted, Raven told her parents she loved them and in hysterics, set course for Ostagar with him to join the Order. She hated Duncan and blamed him for everything. She would sooner be dead than go with this man. Why couldn't he have taken Ser Gilmore and left her to die?

Raven thought all hope had been lost until she met him. Alistair, with his wit and charm almost made Raven forget her troubles for just a moment. It didn't take long for her to develop feelings towards him after everything they went through together. He had been her guide and her mentor during her undertaking of the Joining. And when they went to the tower to light the beacon, she was terrified. She had never considered herself a fighter. She knew how to use daggers, but killing rats in the kitchen back home was nothing compared to fighting the darkspawn. Then she witnessed betrayal for the second time in a few days. Logain betrayed the Grey Wardens just as Arl Howe had betrayed Raven's family. Alistair was devastated by Duncan's death and turned to Raven for support. Being the last two Grey Wardens left in Ferelden meant Alistair and Raven grew closer to each other. They had a mission. To defeat the Archdemon and end this blight once and for all, no matter the cost.

Raven was no longer the feminine noble she used to be. She cut her blonde hair short with her dagger so it did not get in the way of her helmet. She looked towards her mabari hound, Bear, and saw change. He viciously fought darkspawn, tearing them apart with his sharpened claws and teeth. Back in Highever, Bear would simply be a friend to Raven and follow along when she trotted through the meadow on her grey mare. Raven had become a great deal stronger, both emotionally and physically. The death of her parents still haunted her, but she would no longer cry. She had never hated anyone before, but now she constantly thought about how much she hated Arl Howe for what he did to her family and often wanted revenge. She missed the old Raven. The innocent one that wore dresses, braided her long hair and spent her time in the stables with her mare or reading in the library about the world beyond Highever. But Raven Cousland was gone forever. Only the Grey Warden who had lost everything remained.

From across the camp, she looked at Alistair, who was warming himself by the fire. Her mother had always tried to set Raven up with the young men of noble families. But she had not been interested. She appreciated her time alone and was much too shy to speak with them. But now, she wanted nothing more than to spend time with Alistair. There was something different about him, something special. And she felt for him when he told her he was an heir to the throne as a result of his father having an affair with his serving girl. He wanted nothing to do with royalty and he too, felt alone after Duncan's death.

One night, Alistair approached Raven at the camp and asked to go somewhere away from their companions. They found a quiet spot by a river and Raven felt her heart beating faster and faster.

"After everything we've been through together I'm so glad you're you and not some other Grey Warden." admitted Alistair.

"Me too," Raven blushed.

"I have something for you. Do you know what this is?" he pulled a delicate red rose out from behind his back.

"Your new weapon of choice?" she joked, in attempt to cover her nervousness.

"Yes, that's right!" he laughed. "Watch as I thrash our enemies with the mighty power of floral arrangements! Feel my thorns, darkspawn! I will overpower you with my rosy scent!" But then he shrugged and took Raven's hand in his. "Or, you know, it could just be a rose; I know that's pretty dull in comparison."

Raven was speechless.

"I picked it in Lothering," Alistair explained, "I remember thinking, 'how could something so beautiful exist in a place with so much despair and ugliness?'" He looked at the flower, "I probably should have left it alone, but I couldn't. The darkspawn would come and their taint would just destroy it. So I've had it ever since."

Raven tried her best to force words from her mouth, "that's a nice sentiment" she said.

"I thought I might... give it to you, actually." He said, softly, "In a lot of ways, I think the same thing when I look at you." Their eyes met.

Raven smiled at him, urging him to continue, for she was lost for words. Could Alistair see the beautiful, delicate, innocent girl from Highever behind her now scarred exterior?

"I just thought... here I am doing all this complaining, and you haven't exactly been having a good time of it yourself. You've had none of the good experiences of being a Grey Warden since your Joining, not a word of thanks or congratulations. It's all been death and fighting and tragedy."

Raven was shocked. Ever since Ostagar she had felt a connection to him that she did not understand. She could never admit it though and was dumbfounded when she realised the feeling was mutual.

"I wanted to tell you something," he explained, "tell you what a rare and wonderful thing you are to find amidst all this... darkness."

Raven finally found her voice, "I feel the same way about you".

She felt relieved. Raven had been agonizing about whether or not she should tell him. But now the truth was out, and she could not have been happier. And for a moment, they sat in silence as Raven looked at the rose she held in her hand. Alistair raised her hand and kissed it lightly then kissed her cheek gently. With him, Raven felt like herself again. The troubles with the blight and her past were forgotten for just a moment and she felt innocent and completely and utterly content. She rested her head against his shoulder.

"Thank you… for saving me," she whispered.


End file.
